Dave looked up from his laptop in surprise when his doorbell rang. Getting up, he walked to the front door and looked out the peephole to find Hotch standing on his doorstep. Startled, he opened it right away and asked, “Aaron? Are you all right?”

Which was a stupid question, all things considered, but the other man had been back to work for a couple of weeks without any seeming problems. They were between cases and so far as he knew, the arrangement with Jack’s aunt was going well, so for Aaron to just show up unannounced prompted immediate concern.

Aaron looked somewhat abashed at the question and he said, “Yes. I just, can we talk?”

“Of course,” Dave agreed, opening the door further and stepping back to let him in. He locked the door and followed Aaron into the main part of the living room.

Aaron took everything in at a glance and apologized, “I interrupted you, I’m sorry.”

Waving it off, Dave replied, “Don’t worry about it. Sit. Tell me what’s on your mind. You want a drink?”

Aaron shook his head, but did sit on the sofa.

Dave sat on the loveseat, sensing that the other man needed space to talk about whatever he needed to get off his chest. It could be anything from Hailey’s death, to Jack, to a case that might be bothering him. Aaron was a little unpredictable when he decided to talk personally, one-on-one. They’d known each other for a long time now and there were still unplumbed depths to the man sitting so close. Depths that he’d wanted to explore for years, if he was honest with himself.

“Hailey never liked Gideon.”

It was an opening that Dave would never have expected, but he only nodded and waited.

Taking a breath, Aaron continued, “When Gideon was on the team, we…sometimes we were lovers.”

Dave was shocked by the blunt statement, but kept it off his face, remaining neutral.

“Hailey was jealous of him, but not because of the physical aspect. Well, no predominantly because of that. I went to Jason when I needed…more than I could get with Hailey. I took comfort from him that she simply could not provide and that made her angry and jealous.”

The pause was longer this time, so Dave said, “Okay,” to show he was keeping up.

“The comfort that I took from Jason…it wasn’t…” Aaron paused and scrubbed a hand through his hair before going on with, “I regressed.”

Dave blinked at him in surprise and responded, “Excuse me?”

“After a particularly grueling case, not too often, but often enough to have communication about it between Jason and Hailey, I mentally and emotionally regressed to childhood. I’ve gone back as far as five years of age, although typically, I range between eight and eleven. I would stay down in that headspace, for lack of a better word, for a day or two, sometimes three if the team had a longer downtime. He would look after me, let me, let me be a child who had no worries or responsibilities or fears outside of those that most children have.”

It was a lot to take in and yet, not really. For someone as locked down as Aaron, it made sense that when things overwhelmed him, there had to be a way for him to deal with all the horrors he saw and traumas he went through. Garcia hacked for fun. Morgan went through woman after woman. JJ had her family now. Spencer delved into research. As for himself, well, he made a lot of money by writing books about serial killers.

Knowing that Aaron was waiting for a reaction, Dave finally just nodded and prompted, “Go on.”

Aaron’s eyebrows rose in apparent surprise at his easy acceptance, but he said, “That’s the gist of it.”

“No, I mean why are you here now?” Dave clarified.

Aaron’s gaze lowered and he took a few seconds before saying, “I was hoping to presume upon our friendship to…ask you if, if you would take Jason’s place. I feel like I’m going crazy, Dave. I haven’t been able to decompress since Jason left the team. Not like that. And with everything that’s happened…I may need to take that early retirement if I can’t find a way to deal with it all.”

Dave thought it all over for a few minutes, turning the new information over with what he knew about Aaron from their friendship. He knew that the other man would definitely retire before putting anyone else in danger, even perceived danger, from his personal problems. “There’s no other way you can…relieve the pressure?”

Aaron shook his head and answered, “I was hoping that being with Jack and not needing to look over my shoulder would fix things, but it hasn’t. It’s helped a little, but not enough. I need more in order to keep functioning. I wish there were any other way, I hate having to ask this of you and please, don’t feel that you have to say yes. I feel bad enough even drawing you into this, if you say yes out of some kind of misplaced sense of duty or obligation…don’t. Just say yes or no, but do it only if you want to.”

Dave replied slowly, “Just to make sure we’re on the same page, you’re lookin’ for someone to look after you, babysit you essentially, while you regress to being a kid. Nothing else?”

Aaron nodded. “I ah, well, Jason was a very comforting presence for me. He was…very tactile.”

“But nothing sexual?” Dave questioned evenly.

Shaking his head firmly, Aaron confirmed, “Nothing sexual. We were lovers, but not during the times when I regressed.”

Needing to know, Dave asked, “And how do you feel about Gideon now?”

Aaron’s mouth thinned and he took a breath before saying, “It’s been three years since he left and I still feel betrayed. It’s been…difficult for me to trust anyone since then, more than usual at least. The whole situation with Foyette didn’t help. I honestly don’t think I could ask this of anyone except you. We’ve known each other a long time, Dave.”

“We have,” Dave murmured, leaning back against the cushion. “I’m assuming you’re looking for something to happen this week while we’re all off?”

Aaron nodded, fingers laced tightly together, the knuckles standing out. “If that’s all right with you, of course.”

“And what happens if a case comes up?”

“Then you tell me and I come out of that headspace. Jason sprained his ankle during one of our weekends and I came up right away. I’m still me, just…a very young me. If there’s a problem, I respond accordingly.”

Dave half-smiled and told him, “You do realize that I’m terrible with kids.”

Aaron smiled briefly. “I do.”

To most people, this would be a request to end a friendship but then, they weren’t most people. Dave knew better than most just how necessary it was to find a way to release the darkness that they all shoved deep within. Not to be calculating about it, but he’d been searching for a way to find intimacy with Aaron since before he’d started at the BAU. Aaron was the main reason that he’d agreed to take Gideon’s place and now he had the opportunity to do so.

Keeping in mind that this had to be honest on both sides in order to work, Dave told him bluntly, “I want you, Aaron, I’ve made no particular secret of that since I came to work with you, though I haven’t pursued you. And I won’t until you’re back on your feet, emotionally speaking, but I do want to. Is that all right?”

Aaron’s dark gaze shifted away from him and he swallowed before replying softly, “It is, yes.”

Dave prompted, “Are you sure? Because one thing doesn’t depend on the other. I’m happy to be here for you, give you what you need, with no strings.”

Looking over at him, Aaron confessed, “I think it’s time. I kept Jason at arm’s length because I thought I was saving my marriage, but that turned out to be a sham. All of it. I not only lost Hailey, but Jason as well. I won’t divide myself like that again. And I doubt that anyone can claim undue influence or harassment on my part if we do...start a relationship.”

Dave snorted at the thought, which caused Aaron to smile.

“For now, though, I would ask to introduce you slowly to Jack,” Aaron continued. “He’s still shy of strangers and I’m doing my best to shelter him.”

Dave nodded and agreed, “Sure, of course. We’ll go at whatever pace you want.”

Aaron bit his lip and then asked, “So…it’s all right, then? I can stay and…be safe with you?”

The words were so uncertain and filled with unspoken pain that Dave’s heart constricted. That such a good man had had so many terrible things happen to him was an anathema to Dave. He moved to the sofa and put an arm over Aaron’s shoulder, drawing him in close as he’d wanted to do so many times. Pressing his lips to Aaron’s hair, he promised, “You are always safe with me, Aaron. I assume Jack’s with his aunt? You’ve already made arrangements?”

“I did, yes. He’s with her until Monday when I’ll pick him up in the afternoon,” Aaron explained. “I’d hoped your answer would be yes.”

Rubbing Aaron’s shoulder, Dave told him, “Then just be yourself. And try to take it easy on me as a kid.”

Aaron chuckled, a soft, warm sound that went right through Dave. He sighed deeply and actually snuggled closer, as if seeking comfort, and Dave kept rubbing his shoulder. With a yawn, Aaron asked, “I’m tired. Mind if we just nap here for a while? I’ll probably wake up different.”

Dave kissed the top of his head again and ordered, “Go to sleep, kid, I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

The other man slowly grew heavy in his arms, falling asleep by degrees until he was so much deadweight. Dave used the quiet time to think everything over. It was about an hour later that Aaron stirred and when he pulled back, Dave marveled at the difference in his expression and posture. It was as if the years had literally fallen off and the smile that Aaron flashed at him was bright and curious.

“So what’re we doing today?” Aaron asked, even his voice at a higher pitch.

Curious himself, Dave countered, “Well, that depends. How old are you, Aaron?”

Aaron actually rolled his eyes and answered, “Duh. I’m twelve.”

Twelve he could handle. Anything younger than ten was dicey. Grinning, Dave suggested, “How about dinner and then we can watch a movie.”

Giving him what could only be called a sly look, Aaron bargained, “How about dinner and two movies?”

Dave laughed and ruffled his hair, provoking a squawk of protest from the now much-younger Aaron. “Let’s order some pizza and see how late the first movie goes, okay kiddo?”

Aaron nodded and hopped to his feet, looking around. “Your house is boring. Got any games?”

“Did Jason have games?” Dave asked.

Aaron’s face darkened momentarily, but he recovered and nodded. “We usually played board games or cards.”

Dave nodded and made a note to invest in some video games, not ashamed to admit that he wanted to one-up everything Jason Gideon had ever done for Aaron. “Okay. Well, I’ll order the pizza. You can go explore, just don’t break anything.”

“Yeah, I’m not a little kid or whatever,” Aaron retorted, jogging away.

Shaking his head at the strangeness of his life, Dave went to order the pizza.

* * * *

The sun was just coming up, filtering in through the shades of the large bedroom. Aaron watched Dave sleep and wondered how two very different Dads could make him feel so safe. Jason was gone, he knew that and hurt about it, hurt even still to think about it. But Dave was here now and he was good and kind and a lot of fun to be around. More fun than Jason in some ways, which made him feel a little guilty since Jason had been so good to him.

They’d had pizza and soda and stayed up way late passed midnight before sleeping in their clothes. He hadn’t even needed to brush his teeth, which gave Aaron a thrill. Jason had always been so strict about that.

Skimming his fingers over the older man’s face, he almost dared to touch the mustache, but didn’t. So very different. But Aaron knew that he’d be a good different and felt in his stomach that they’d be important to each other. Smiling at the thought, he put an arm around Dave’s waist and closed his eyes again.

Maybe he could convince Dave to get some video games.

* * * *

Dave groaned as he lowered himself to the sofa. Aaron had woken up filled with a restless energy that had needed more than movies or poker to expiate. Dave had had the stupid idea to go hiking, which the kid had loved, of course. It had done the trick, the day-long adventure wearing out Aaron in a way little else would have, but it wiped him out, too.

“God I hate nature,” he muttered, rubbing his eyes.

He took a swig of the whiskey that he’d poured and relished the burn as it burned down his gullet. Aaron was safely tucked into bed after dinner and a hot shower, knocked out as if drugged instead of just sleeping. Dave smiled as he admitted to himself that it had been a good day. He’d enjoyed the company and the exertion.

Watching the younger man run here and there, climb boulders, and just letting loose in general had made him happy in an unexpected way. Dave hadn’t ever wanted kids, but now he thought maybe he’d missed out on something. And if he managed to build a relationship with Aaron for real, than these kinds of weekends would give him what he’d never had.

Not to mention Jack, a voice inside reminded.

He would have a ready-made family in Aaron and it was something Dave was looking forward to, even with the crap they would have to wade through at work. Aaron had ‘come up’ enough when they got home to call Jack and make sure he was doing all right. As soon as he hung up the phone, though, he was right back to being twelve and demanding another movie, which Dave had avoided by getting him into the shower.

A terrified scream from upstairs launched him from the sofa without him consciously moving. When he got to the bedroom, faster than he ever remembered, Aaron was thrashing around under the blankets moaning in a despairing fear that raised the hairs on the back of Dave’s neck.

Shaking Aaron’s shoulder, Dave barely avoided a punch in the face when the younger man woke still fighting whatever demon his subconscious had dredged up. Aaron wrapped both arms around his neck, sobbing and talking over himself about the ‘bad man’ and ‘miss Jason’ and ‘killed her.’ Dave had no idea what to do, so he just held on and rubbed Aaron’s back, rocking them in what he hoped was a soothing movement.

It seemed to take forever before Aaron stopped crying and the words finally ended. Dave lowered him back down and untangled from him to go to the bathroom and rinse a washcloth with warm water. He used it to gently clean Aaron’s face and then held out a tissue box and ordered, “Blow your nose.”

Aaron did so a few times and then snuffled mightily and said, “Sorry. Didn’t mean to be such a baby.”

Dave combed his fingers through Aaron’s hair and told him firmly, “Having a nightmare is not being a baby. Neither is crying. Now. You want to talk about it?”

Not meeting his gaze, Aaron shook his head before whispering, “Older me will tomorrow. Can I go back to sleep now?”

With a nod, Dave agreed, “Sure, kiddo, go ahead. Hey, let me lock up and I’ll join you, okay? Being alone in a new place probably didn’t help.”

The grateful look that Aaron threw his way had Dave silently cursing himself for not having thought of that sooner. He turned on the alarm system and then hurried back upstairs, changing into sweats and a tee before joining Aaron under the covers. The other man instantly curled around him, his face buried against Dave’s throat as he mumbled, “Night, Dad.”

The words sent a flush of something he couldn’t quite identify through Dave, accompanied by a fierce sense of over-protectiveness. Stretched out and worn out, his thoughts finally quieted enough to let him sleep.

* * * *

Dave had to admit that Aaron looked a hell of a lot better the next morning when he woke up. Some of the lines that had seemed permanently etched into his face had faded and there was a lighter sense around him as he packed dirty clothes into his travel bag. Dressed in casual clothes and sneakers, Aaron actually looked his age instead of about five to seven years older, as he did at work.

Half-grinning, he asked, “So how’d I do?”

Aaron smiled at him and replied, “Very well, thank you. Although, make me brush my teeth next time, it felt a little grimy waking up this morning.”

Chagrinned that he’d completely forgotten that, Dave promised, “I will. You look better.”

“I feel better,” Aaron said, that small smile still present. “And I understand that there will be video games next time?”

Dave smirked a little and said, “Welcome to the twentieth century.”

Sitting on the bed, his smile fading, Aaron told him, “Jason and I would generally talk after a weekend like this, but what can I say that you don’t already know? I’m still wrestling with my guilt over Hailey’s death and killing Foyette. I’ve never lost control like that in my life, Dave, not once. To kill a man with my bare hands…I’m horrified…and terrified, that I might snap again and do it in the future. I know for a fact that I would kill to protect Jack. How can I bring that to work with me?”

Dave thought about it for a long moment before saying, “We’ve all got it in us, Aaron, you know that. Hell, I’d kill to protect you and not lose a wink of sleep over it.”

Aaron blinked at him in apparent surprise and then asked, almost shyly, “You would?”

Walking over to him, Dave squeezed his shoulder and stated flatly, “In a heartbeat. We protect our own, Aaron, and that goes even more for those we love as family. And you are family to me, you and Jack both.”

“Thank you,” Aaron murmured, standing. “That means…a lot, to me.”

Dave cupped his face and leaned in slowly, giving Aaron time to turn away. When he didn’t, Dave kissed him gently, trying to convey just how very much the other meant to him. Aaron’s mouth opened hesitantly and Dave deepened the kiss, accepting the invitation. He slid an arm around Aaron’s waist and tugged him in close while they kissed, learning the contours of his palette and making him shiver as their tongues tangled wet and slow.

Aaron broke it off and rested their foreheads together as he caught his breath. He finally said, “I should get home to Jack.”

Accepting the diversion tactic for the time being, Dave released him. “How about I take you and Jack to dinner tonight?”

Half-smiling, Aaron quipped, “As long as it’s not pizza, that sounds nice. Why don’t you stop by around six?”

Dave picked up his bag, almost daring Aaron to protest, but the younger man didn’t. “I’ll be there with bells on.”

They walked out to the car where Dave kissed him again, short and sweet and wishing for more.

“Thank you for all of this,” Aaron whispered, looking up at him.

Dave laced their fingers together and repeated simply, “You’re family, Aaron.”

That prompted that shy smile to reappear and then Aaron was in the car and driving away. Dave watched him go and then walked back into the house, for some reason unable to stop smiling.